One Year Survivor

I can still hear the sound of the rain that was pounding on the windows when I sat down to write my first blog entry. It seems appropriate now that as I write my last entry, it is quiet. I decided about two months ago that my last blog entry would be on the anniversary of my diagnosis. Here we are, one year later. I am officially a “One Year Cancer Survivor”.

I thought I would throw in another Q & A to help wrap things up.

Q – Am I cancer free?
A – Let’s hope so. My oncologist tells me that it will be ten years before we know if all the treatments worked. One down, nine to go.

Q – If I could change the events of the past year, would I?
A – Strangely enough, no. I’m a strong believer that everything happens for a reason. I think cancer is one of the best things that has ever happened to me. After the past year, I can say that life seems richer than ever before.

Q – If I had to do it all again, would I?
A – Yes, in a minute.

Q – What kind of testing or appointments will I have from here on in?
A - I will continue to see my oncologist every 9 weeks for the next 2 years. I will continue with my Herceptin infusions until June. I will be taking Tamoxifen for 5 years. I will have annual mammograms; the next one being February 23rd.

Q – Will I have my tattoos removed?
A - No. They’re a good reminder for me on how precious life is.

Q – Will I miss writing in my blog?
A – Yes, but seeing as things are getting back to normal, what would I write about? ‘Today I had soup for lunch. Andrew had a hockey game tonight. I baked cookies for Valentine’s Day.’ I’ll spare you from all those boring details.

Q – How will you know what’s happening to me?
A – Call me, e-mail me, drop by.

I have to take this last opportunity to thank all of you for ‘getting on the bus’. You were part of my therapy; you kept encouraging me and kept me moving forward. I will be forever grateful.

To Steve, who endured more than anyone, no words can ever describe how much you mean to me. Happy Valentine’s Day.

Thank you.

The end.

me

Fulltime

Today I started back to work fulltime. I laugh because I had at doctor’s appointment at 2pm...so maybe tomorrow is my first official fulltime day. So far so good.

Friday I’ll be having and ECG and Echocardiogram to make sure all is well with my heart. I’ll be wearing a heart monitor for 48 hours so if you see me at wearing it you’ll know it’s not a new iPod.

me

1 in 9

Today the doctor in genetics said, “I have good news, we did not find any mutation in BRCA1 or BRCA2.” Translation…I did not inherit a BRCA1 or BRCA2 gene mutation and I will not pass one on to Andrew or Sean. The Lincoln’s and O’Bryan’s can have some relief that this mutation isn’t floating around our family. So I fall into the 90% pool of people who get cancer for environmental reasons. When you figure that 1 in 9 women will get breast cancer in their life, someone has to get it, and I guess my number was picked.

My next appointment today was with my radiologist. This was just a follow-up appointment. The doctor said that everything looked and felt good so she didn’t want to see me for a year. Although I’ll still have appointments with my oncologist every 9 weeks, it was strange to hear a doctor tell me that I wouldn’t see them for a year. During this process you lose the ability to think too far into the future. So it was like, ‘Wow, she thinks I’ll still be alive in a year…that’s awesome!’ As trivial as all that may seem, today it gave me huge sense of accomplishment, even more so than when I finished chemo or radiation. It makes me smile.

me

Remember

This past week at work just seemed to fly by. I’m slowly starting to remember everything I used to do including my routine at home.

It was a year ago on February 2nd that I had the mammogram, ultrasound and biopsy then the wait to find out the test results. It was on my mind all week. I can remember every detail of that day as if it were yesterday. It’s amazing what I’ve learned in a year.

This week I will be seeing my radiologist for a check-up. I will also be meeting with one of the doctors in genetics…my test results are finally in. Remember the blood work they did for the tests??? That was back in May! As I said before, only about 5 - 10% of cancer is genetic; the rest is environmental. If my cancer is not genetic, it makes me wonder what I did or didn’t do, what I ate or what I touched or where I went that started those cells to go wacko in the first place. Perhaps we’ll never know.

me

Back to Work

Today was my first day back to work. Rosemary did a wonderful job decorating my office with pink balloons and streamers. Many of the staff were wearing pink shirts and pink leis. I was surprised at the number of people who came to the office for cake. As you may have already guessed, my tears started to flow and I wasn’t able to say much more than, “Thank you for coming and read my speech tonight on the blog.”

So, thank you to everyone who took the time to come to Finance to welcome me back. It was nice to see so many smiling faces. I came to Western to go to school when I was 19 and I have never left. (The past five years have really flown by.) Western is like a second home to me.

It’s good to be home.

me

Disney

Wow, what a trip. We all had a fantastic time at Disney. Everyday was packed full of fun from 9am to 10pm. This is Disney’s “Year of a Million Dreams”. As part of the celebration, at each park they randomly give out a lanyard with fastpasses (a fastpass allows you to get on the ride ahead of everyone else in line so the wait time for the ride is only a few minutes) to the most popular rides. Getting the lanyard at each park is just a matter of being in the right place at the right time. It turned out that in Animal Kingdom, MGM Studios and Epcot, we were in the right place and got the lanyard. The chances of getting just one lanyard is slim but three is unheard of! We were very lucky.

I can’t even begin to list all the great things we did and saw; the list is so long. I will say though that I managed to get Steve on the Tower of Terror (with a $100 bribe) and Mission: SPACE (orange team).

A special BIG thank you to Steve’s parents Bob and Carolyn who made it all possible.

We arrived home Thursday night and my appointment in Nuclear Medicine came all too early at 8:45am Friday morning. I had to have another Wall Motion Study to check effects of Herceptin on my heart.

I’m back to work on Monday…seems hard to believe. Andrew said, “If people ask you if you got a haircut, tell them you didn’t.” I asked what I should say. He said, “Tell them you had to take care of something.” I asked again what I should say if they asked what I had to take care of and he said, “Tell them to mind their own business.” I told him I was pretty sure that everyone knew I had cancer so everything would be fine.

Well, back to the unpacking and laundry.

me

The Secret is Out

Let the fun begin!

me

The Letter

A year ago I was standing in my closet trying to figure out what to wear to work…what was clean, what could pass as clean and what had to be ironed. So I was thinking, “Black pants, striped sweater, no, blue pants…I have cancer.” I was thrown by the thought but just kept getting ready for work. Here we are now January 2007, you know the rest.

To bring a happy ending to the last year, tomorrow we are going to Disney World with the kids and Steve’s parents. The best part is that the kids don’t know yet. They think tomorrow is another school day. Because Andrew and Sean LOVE to get mail, that’s how I decided we should tell them, in a letter at breakfast tomorrow morning. So here it is.

Dear Andrew and Sean,

We want you to know how proud we are of you both. You are two very special boys. You have made the past year easier on us as Mom gets rid of her cancer.

So, we are going to have a family celebration. There will be no school today or for the next eight days. After you have breakfast and get dressed, (don’t forget to brush your teeth) we will be going to the airport and flying to Florida to go to Disney World!

We love you so much. This will be the best vacation ever!

Love,
Mom and Dad
xoxo

Needless to say, they are going to freak out and we’ll have the video camera set up to catch it all.

me

Herceptin Infusion 10 of 18

Today I was back at the Cancer Clinic to have my 10th Herceptin infusion. I ran into Colleen, who had had her 4th radiation appointment and was waiting to see her surgeon. She was able to hang out with me for my infusion; it was nice to have her company. This picture was taken at the Pink Party when we were both follicly challenged.

I’ve been keeping a hot flash diary this week as part of my follow-up appointment for the hot flash clinic on the 16th. So far I’m having 7 or 8 a day which is better than my experience before taking the Effexor. I’ve also noticed that the hot flashes aren’t as intense as they were before the Effexor.

Tonight I was at the running clinic where we moved up to 7 and 1’s ( 3 sets of 7 minutes of running followed by 1 minute of walking). I was amazed at how well I felt after the run. I guess doing my ‘homework’ paid off.

Off to bed now,
me

Haircut

Ah...the sweet sound of scissors. I had my first real haircut today. My hairdresser Elias, even got his hair dryer out! Elias actually had to sweep the floor when he was done. He has all these plans about colouring my hair a mahogany colour at my next appointment. A year ago I probably would have nixed the idea but now he can colour it green for all I care; after being bald, I'll go for anything.

I've decided that I really need to get serious about getting some exercise so I've joined a running group. I thought I had joined the beginner group but it turns out I joined the 5km group by mistake. I told Steve and the boys when I got home. Andrew said, "Just quit." Steve turned to Andrew and said, "Mom doesn't quit anything." I laughed, but I guess it's true.

me

Happy New Year

Day 3 of 2007...so far so good.

I'm still trying to figure out the side effects of Tamoxifen....nausea, fatigue, hot flashes. Hopefully they will subside once my body gets used to taking the medication.

I've started the process of getting things in order to go back to work. I've spoken to the insurance company and to Rehabilitation Services at UWO. Things seem to be running smoothly for my return at the end of the month.

With any luck, things should be back to normal soon.

me